The hardest part is over

I don't mind buying and wrapping gifts for the holidays. I don't mind standing in line to mail them. I don't mind the cooking and cleaning that come with the holidays.

I do MIND trying to figure out what to wear to holiday parties.

My office party invitation says "casual formal". What the hell does that mean? Men need a tux but they can wear tennis shoes with it?

Big Princess was home from college last weekend and I made her follow me around to 7 different stores where I probably tried on 30 outfits. (Hey, somebody's got to zip up those ball-breaking, inconveniently placed zippers.) I still didn't find anything that demanded I buy it right then and there, it was so perfect. I did have an outfit put on hold. It was almost $200 before any accessories. I figured Big Daddy better love it before I drop that on a dress I'll only wear about 10 hours (between 3 holiday parties, in separate cities).

So I dragged him to Dillard's the next day. He wasn't impressed (i.e. he just shrugged is shoulders). He picked out a couple of dresses and I tried them on and hey, this dark blue satin cocktail dress is pretty and less than $100. I didn't think he'd go for it but I suggested we go downstairs and look at the shawls. After looking at and hold 10 of them up to the dress, we finally selected a silver satin one.

Ok, now I'm really pushing my luck. "Hey honey, shoes are just right over there and I wonder if they have anything to match my outfit." I cringed, waiting for the beating and angry words to spew forth from his mouth. He said, Ok.

After 13 different shoes, the silver, perfectly matched to my outfit shoe screamed, "I'm on sale, BUY ME bitch before the tired-of-your-shit salesclerk decides to charge you triple for me!"

So if "casual formal" means cocktail dress with slutty stilettos, I'm totally ready for the holidays.















* Imagine my toenails a deep, dark blue.