Peeing Your Pants for Fun and Profit

I was at a Safety Meeting in the tiny town of Edna. I would be speaking about Operator Qualifications to the field guys and area managers. Apparently everyone wants some of these guys time. Two corporate guys show up to discuss some of their issues with everyone too. Now these two are known for their ability to talk. If you are unlucky enough to be in a meeting with them, you'd better block out the rest of the day... cause they can talk forever.

So the safety meeting is about an hour, I get like 20 min., one of them delivers his speal over the next hour and finally Scooter starts.

It goes on and on. Its 30 min. past lunch time. My stomach is growling and my head is starting to spin but he continues spewing words. Then, he says the words that will forever cause me to pee my pants...

"Ya'll need to utilize the Measurement Dept. They're a wealth of knowledge and resources. I know when I'm here I like to milk Leonard."

I fell out of my chair laughing.

No one else even cracked a smile. I don't know if they were in a coma from listening to all of us pontificate on stuff they don't care that much about but that was the funniest shit I've ever heard.

So I go home that night and relate the story to the princesses and I get the giggles all over again. Later that same night I go into the kitchen and on the large dry erase board on the wall I find:

I procede to pee my pants for about the 3rd time that day.