Dr. Feel Good

My hip is bothering me. Giving birth to Big Princess ruined my young supple body. My hips didn't spread during pregnancy like they should have. Now 20 years later I still suffer occassionally from a nerve that gets trapped in the hip socket. So I'm just walking along and BAM, severe pain, can't bear weight, drag leg behind me, etc. I held out about 4 days thinking it would get better on its on but no luck. I called my smokin hot chiropractor and got an appointment in 45 min.

I walked in and complete my paperwork. The nurse? says the doctor will have to re-evaluate since I haven't been seen in the last 6+ months. (He fixed a rotator cuff problem about a year ago.) I'm like, sue me for feeling good. They take me back to the exam room and I sit there waiting for the good (looking) doctor to see me.

He walks in and does a double take.

"You've lost weight since I've seen you."

"A little", I confess.

"A little? Wow, you look great."

Now I'm just smiling.... thru the pain.

He examines me, asks some questions, and proclaims my right leg is shorter than the left. "Oh, goody." He says some ice and electric shock therapy will warm up the muscles before he adjusts me. So I lay face down for 20 minutes with ice on my back and pads on my butt cheeks, shocking me and causing my cheeks to involuntarily clench up.

Then, on to traction. He has me lay face up on a table and stretches my "short" leg. It only goes to about 35 degrees in the air before I black out from the pain. He twists and stretches it around and around, seemingly looking for the point I bite his hand off in pain.

He then comes around the other side to torture my "longer" leg. He lifts it straight up and tells me to tell him when it hurts. He gets it to about 145 degrees when I ask if he plans to pull it over my head "because that's an advanced yoga move and I'm only in the intermediate class." He laughs, "you are extremely flexible." "Thanks, I know my husband appreciates it."